(Originally Reviewed on July 27, 2009)
I often have discussion with many of my friends (men) who are in relationships or are married in regards to situations they have had with their wives or girlfriends and needless to say, our conversations tend to start with “does this happen to you?”. And never a discussion about what we love about our significant others but mostly the things that we do, that are not good enough or the signs that we may have missed. Somehow, after an argument (which are foolish most of the time), we find ourselves sleeping on the couch or the guest room.
I guess each time we have these discussions, we come to a full realization that as men… there is no way we can understand women. And women, we think we may know what you want but somehow we end up feeling stupid each time we get into an argument with you. Even more confusing is when we don’t understand why.
And we won’t want to watch “Dr. Phil” or an expert tell us what we are doing wrong. We just pick up the phone, call our friends and complain and I’m sure it happens on both the men and women’s side of things.
So, I finished the advanced reader’s copy of “Women Are Crazy, Men Are Stupid” by entertainment writers, Howard J. Morris (“Dream On”, “Home Improvement”, “According to Jim”, etc.) and Jenny Lee (“Samantha Who?”) who are a real couple who share their real life relationship situations in this book. Through their witty humor, we see the male side and the female side of situations. Those of us in relationships have been there before but somehow, it just feels good to have a book like this to read and not affiliated with some academic think they have it all figured out. Personally, I don’t think its possible. And to summarize into a few words of how I felt about this book, I think this should suffice: I loved it!
I really enjoyed this book (again, this review is for the advanced copy version and may change for the final version) because not only do these two talented and humorous individuals share personal situations of their relationship, but Howard J. Morris does a great job of explaining things for the male side. Jenny Lee does a great job of explaining things on the female side. Howard would explain a variety of situations that happened and how Jenny responded and why.
Take for example, Howard’s appreciation for High Definition. HD!!! Many of my friends are into HD, Blu-ray and we just are amazed to watch and listen to things in HD. Jenny talks about how she would like their relationship to be viewed in HD. It may not sound like much to a person not familiar with us rabid video and audiophiles but to hear Jenny tells this to Howard, I can see instantly see where she is coming from. How a lot of who watch things on Blu-ray will talk about how a certain scene looks crisp, clear and vibrant. On the female end, why can’t the relationship be in HD as well? If men are enjoying life in such clarity and beauty, why can’t we imagine our relationship’s in such a way.
Also, the feeling of men buying flowers. It’s so important earlier in the relationship but along the way, for many men, they forget or don’t want to after long years being with that person. Jenny for her passion of “peonies” and Howard doing what he can to find Peonies around Valentine’s Day but like many men, some don’t see the value of flowers. It’s either for birthday, Valentine’s Day or Mother’s Day? But for some women, it’s more than that, getting them when they least expect it outside of those typical days of when men are expected to buy their loves ones flowers.
Or the crazy questions that couples ask in their early relationship such as “Do you think my sister is attractive?”, “Which of my friends do you find most attractive?”, “Do I look fat?”… Guys can answer these questions differently, but some of us know that these questions must be answered with full awareness of that if you mess up, there may be a slight repercussion.
There are plenty of examples that both Morris and Lee have to talk about. Especially information regarding their previous marriage which led to divorce and signs that were missed or eye opening situations of what one expects in a relationship. Their fears in being in another serious relationship. It’s one thing to read this book and knowing there will be humor but it’s great to read a book that borders on the topics of things that myself and many men discuss and knowing our wives/girlfriends discuss with their friends and not really understanding each other.
Another example, is how Jenny looks at how television shows or celebrity couples are and how it affects a relationship. A good chapter is spent on this and it was quite interesting to read how both individuals view this. I can tell you with my guy friends (who are all married), getting into discussions of “do not watch ‘Revolutionary Road’ with your wife” or non-married friends will talk about “Jon & Kate Plus Eight” and somehow deep inside and then really getting into the psyche of a person and being a day changing situation for some couples.
Of course, this book is not meant for the single person who wants to have fun right now, nor is it meant for those who feel they have a perfect relationship with brilliant communication with their significant others. This book was truly meant for us men and women who have difficulty understanding each other in a relationship. Those of us who get into arguments over stupid things but yet what may be quite dumb to one side, is something of importance to the other.
As for the book, don’t judge the book by the first two chapters. Give it some time and see where the writers are going with and then you realize to yourself, that they are on to something.
This book is not a psychiatric evaluation of your relationship or how one should be. But it’s those typical situations that tend to set us off in relationship and we just need to understand each other. Both Howard and Jenny try to help us through their experiences and possibly help others out there. Yes, women are crazy and men are stupid. I totally agree! But I’m also a believer that its one thing to be in a relationship and to have these wild emotions but its further enhanced when children are brought into the picture.
As for “Women Are Crazy, Men Are Stupid”, definitely a book that I highly recommend! Enjoyable, witty and literally, an eye-opener!